Monday, July 14, 2014

summer days and a dating rant;

it's been awhile since i've blogged (*complained) about dating huh hahaha.
well, so at work, i sit in what's called the girls' corner. it's appropriately named because it's me and three other girls and we talk about every girly thing you can possibly think of.
when we're taking a break, you can often find us in our corner swooning over engagement pictures/wedding stuff (one of the girls is engaged) or talking about dating haha.
recently, i feel like the dating situation hasn't been so great and so here are some of my thoughts:
1. if you're not interested in the person you're dating anymore (the first three months are usually the honeymoon period and everything's great and then the real test is right after that. people often lose interest or problems start to come up), it is kinder to just break up with them. it will crush him/her but the earlier you do it, the better.
2. if you're not interested in a person, there is no need to force yourself to go on a date with him/her. one of my coworkers told us that she has a date tonight and that she really didn't want to go. and so i asked her straight up, "well then why did you agree to the date?" she replied that she wanted to give him at least a chance (that's good - you should give everyone a fair chance) and it would be a good reason for her to get out of the whole thing by saying she tried and is not interested (okay this part is not so kind because if you're going into the date with that attitude, you're not giving the person a fair chance). and guess what, she ended up canceling the date thus bringing me back to my point - if you're not interested, just say no. it will save both sides a lot of trouble and heartache.
3. DO NOT lead people on. this is like the most cruel thing to do ever. my coworker had this experience recently and when she found out that the guy wasn't actually interested in her, it left her confused and crushed because the guy had been so nice to her and flirty too. be aware of your own actions and don't do that to others.

that being said, i've also received some really good dating advice lately: 
1. don't over-invest in the initial stages of dating. just take it that you're making a new friend and let things fall into its natural place.
2. don't rule out the guys who have always been around you. you may not have been interested in them all these years you've known them but you'll never know when you'll suddenly realize that they have some good qualities that you admire in a partner.
3. when you're starting to date a guy, talk to his good friends about what he's like - his friends can reveal a lot of insights into his personality and if he's a good match for you. 
4. don't ever compare your relationship to anything - we all come from different backgrounds and rather than insisting on doing what you've grown up with/seen other successful couples do, create something that works for your relationship and belongs to the both of you. 
5. recognize a person's potential - this one is super hard and i personally struggle with this too but if we're looking at others just as God would look at us, sometimes we can help our eternal companion to act and work toward his potential.

anyway, i'll get off my soapbox.
so, this summer has been super hot and everyday i feel like i'm melting at the gym hahaha.
anyway, since my sister is gone, i've been trying to spend more time meeting up with my friends who i have maybe neglected haha. 
last wednesday, my roommates and i went to see a friend Will perform in oklahoma up in midway and that was a lot of fun. it was an outdoor thing and they were really good for a community theater. i was impressed for sure. 
excited faces!

and then last thursday night kersti and i finally got the chance to catch up over indian food.
we used to be really good about meeting up at least once every month or two to catch up but ever since i moved to salt lake and we got busy with life, it's been a real struggle.
and it makes me sad because catching up with her is the best. 
something about her just makes me spill out everything i keep dearly in my heart and it's good to just let it out once in awhile you know.
and yeah, we see each other at other parties or what not but it's hard to really have a heart-to-heart with everyone else around you, you know haha. 
hopefully this is not the last time we catch up this summer hahaha. 
我的同伴 
we went to this restaurant called royal india in sandy because there were a lot of good reviews and it did not live up to expectations. i was surprised cause it is run by legit indian people (like i could not understand the waiter cause his accent was so thick) and so i expected more.  
we came out of the restaurant and a storm was brewing and so we had a hard time getting a proper photo and just kept laughing and laughing and laughing hahaha. 

last weekend was a very happy one.
i kicked off the weekend with a trip to the farmers market. i've been wanting to go for awhile now but have just been busy. and so i finally went and it was hot and all but it was nice to just walk around and also get some summer lemonade hahaha. 
and then, we went to my favorite german deli - siegfried's to get some lunch before i headed back home to watch the brazil-netherlands game (so happy that netherlands thrashed brazil 3-0!)
watermelon lemonade // juli and her sandwich

on saturday night, i had a little reunion with two of my bestest girlfriends ever.
we used to hang out every single weekend our freshman and sophomore years and then i went on my mission, came back and liz went on her mission and we've just all been really scattered and so it was so nice to finally hang out again!
we went to dinner at guru's and then had froyo at spoon it up.
we hung out for like 5 hours that night and it was the greatest thing ever.
we caught up on life, talked about old memories, giggled while watching our old videos and photos, talked about dating and marriage and took a million pictures hahaha.
it's been a really really long time since i last took so many photos all in one night.
we used to do that ALL the time.
and i absolutely loved how we carried on our conversations - sometimes in korean and sometimes in english hahaha. it was fabulous haha. 
my favorite was when we were talking about our 이상형 (ideal type).
i described my 이상형, liz described hers and then we asked sora about hers and she said the cutest thing ever, "my 이상형 is doosan" hahahaha (she and our other good friend doosan have been dating since we all met in 2008 haha).
that reunion made us realize how much we've missed each other and we're determined to make an effort to hang out more often now haha. 
at guru's
selca 
we were setting the timer hahaha
the froyo place had really fun walls to pose with 
sora taught us how to do aegyo poses and she's seriously the queen of aegyo poses haha. liz insisted on us taking an aegyo video comparing our aegyos and hahaha omg, sora is so so so good at it! we're going to watch that video again next year or something (at sora's wedding? ;)) and die laughing hahaha. 
laughing at my inability to do aegyo poses hahaha 
these two are the best
love <3<3<3

we were all super sad to say goodbye as we departed for our separate ways and then continued to chat on katalk that night in our group chat and laugh at the photos that we were sending each other hahaha.
friendships like that are so hard to come by and honestly, girlfriends are so important!
and so that was my weekend. and to top it off, germany won the world cup and so i was super super happy. also, morgan came by to visit me last night cause she was in the area and so i closed my weekend with a smile on my face.

xoxo,
C

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