Friday, October 3, 2014

when you're single...

do you like the title of my post? hahaha
it's actually been quite awhile since i've done a dating rant haha but recent events have triggered a post haha.
the bad part about living in a country where there are four seasons is, when it gets cold, you feel lonelier haha. it definitely doesn't help when you're in your mid 20s and basically all your friends are married and having babies haha.

today, i'm going to blog about some awkward situations you find yourself in when you're single:
1. work parties or work-related events where everyone is with their spouse or significant other. you spend the night meeting and learning all about your coworkers' spouses, and also listening to and watching them tell their stories in unison. and then if you're hanging out with one couple and they have to leave so that he/she can introduce their significant other to everyone else at the party, you pick up your plate of food and move on to another table to chat with yet another couple haha. and if it's a work party that you helped plan then you find yourself volunteering at the sign-in table all night so that you don't have to deal with this all night:
coworker: "charlotte, this is my husband/boyfriend XX"
me: "hi, nice to meet you. i'm charlotte."

2. showing up to gatherings or getting invited to gatherings and people saying/asking you, "just you?" yes, just me myself and i, thanks for the reminder that i'm single.

3. going to dinner gatherings with your friends and it suddenly hits you that everyone around you is married and so they have a built-in companion. you find yourself the only single friend in the room and then there are moments when you're just standing there alone eating silently... totally awkward.

4. and then the conversation all night kind of keeps coming back to marriage/kid-related topics and then the topic of maternity leave is brought up and one of the girls asks you, "how long is maternity leave at your company?" and then her husband goes, "how would she know?" in THAT tone and i'm just like, why yes i'm very single and not even close to that point but i do have pregnant coworkers or coworkers who have had babies you know haha. 

5. that moment when you're chatting with your coworkers at the monthly birthday celebration and one of them brings up, "so, let's talk about how we can marry charlotte off" and then someone goes, "ooh ooh, i know, someone needs to set up a website called" and you just want to dig a hole and bury your head. 

6. and then said coworker who brought up the awkward topic in the first place asks you at the end of the birthday celebration, "so charlotte, will you commit to meeting one new asian boy this week?" what the hell haha.
7. and then one week later, while you're walking around in the office minding your own business and getting your work done, he yells across the hallway, "so charlotte, did you go on a date like you committed to?"( i did not commit to anything -_-)

8. when you go out with family friends and they look at you and say, "but you're pretty leh." what should i say to that? seriously.

9. when your parents tell you about their friends' kids that are having children and you're just over here like "woohoo, enjoying single life!"

10. when people ask you what you're going to do for the holidays with a really sad and pitiful look because you're all alone in this foreign country and you're not married so you can't even go spend thanksgiving or whatever with your husband's family.

life can be hard and some days i don't enjoy being single but some days i really do and i've really learned a lot about living life while single. 
in regional conference last month, elder oaks talked about trusting in the Lord's timing and how being able to do that will bring perspective and help us to understand that now is the time for other blessings and opportunities and that we should not neglect those because we just want to get married. 
i also read a quote from president faust recently that was right on point, "It does not help to become so obsessed with the desire to be married that we miss the blessings and opportunities for development while we are single... if you are striving for excellence - if you are trying your best day by day with the wisest use of your time and energy to reach realistic goals - you will be a success whether you are married or single."

so yeah, i hope to be better at focusing on how i can improve myself instead of feeling sad about my #foreveralone status haha so hopefully people around me will be merciful and stop putting me in awkward situations haha.
and you know what's the one question i hate the most and will be absolutely offended by? this: "have you ever thought of trying online dating?" no no and NO. i can meet people fine on my own thank you. 

anyway, just thought other people could use a laugh from these situations and happy weekend!